Thursday, December 22, 2016

A Visit From St. Fandom

'Twas the night before Christmas, and there on the couch,
A creature was stirring and starting to slouch.
The blankets were piled with nary a space,
In hopes that St. Fandom would soon show his face.
The family was snoring, asleep in their beds,
Their small, mundane dreams flitting over their heads;
And the creature was falling asleep to the sound
Of the characters she loved galavanting around,
When all of a sudden, to her great surprise,
Steven Moffat appeared and bid her to rise!
Away to the window they flew like the Flash,
Where they were joined by John Watson styling a mustache;
And what to their wondering eyes did arrive
But a TARDIS, the DeLorean, and the starship Enterprise.
The doors opened up and out stepped a whole host
Of superheroes, aliens, and even the library ghost.
St. Fandom appeared, with Moffat in his wake,
And everywhere you looked was an air of heartbreak.
St. Fandom clapped once and his voice rang out clear
As he called every character the girl held so dear:
"Now, Samwise! now, Frodo! now, Kirk, Bones, and Spock!
On, Harry! on, Ginny! and on, dear Sherlock!
Now, Lorelai, Rory! now, Sam, Cas, and Dean!
On, Hawkeye! on, Batman! and on, Rachel Green!
Into the TARDIS, everyone, now!
We've got much to do, more than time will allow!"
One after another, they walked through that door:
Merlin, then Darcy, then Ghostbuster four;
Hamilton and Burr were the last to get in,
After Aladdin and Jasmine, Rapunzel and Flynn.
When the TARDIS was full, they took to the air,
With the DeLorean and Enterprise also up there;
Up to the housetop the vehicles they flew,
With a bag of emotions, and St. Fandom, too.
And then, in a twinkling, she heard up above her,
A scuffle and a voice saying, "SHH! WE'RE UNDERCOVER!"
She smiled to herself and was turning around
When down the chimney St. Fandom came with a bound.
Down came Han Solo, James Kirk, and Baby Groot;
They all were disgruntled and covered in soot.
Bearing no gifts, they stood there in the den,
Seeming unsure of what the plan was again;
St. Fandom stepped forward and pulled from his robe
A packet of tissues and a tiny snow globe.
He nodded in apology and patted her head;
Han Solo approached and kissed her instead.
The others followed suit, with Groot lagging behind,
Then one by one out the window they climbed.
She shook the small snow globe and with a big yawn
Saw every character that was just on her lawn.
Still half asleep, she went out in the snow,
And there was St. Fandom in the soft, moonlit glow;
The whole crew was there and they whistled and winked,
Each face so beloved, each voice so distinct.
St. Fandom took off on a mission quite clear
To give fangirls and fanboys good feels and great cheer,
But she heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight:
"Happy bingeing to all, and to all a good night!"

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from The Fangirl Initiative!


  1. This is delightful. Seriously, so clever. I gasped and giggled at almost every line.

    Hooray for St. Fandom!!